Origami and a trip

Went to the pool the other day and did another some laps.. I'm now up to 54 laps so far this Summer...

...that's more than a mile of swimming, almost 20 years after HS, damn.

I might only get to make it to the pool once this week, I'm not sure... it's good to take it easy, try not to over do... if I can make 5 miles this Summer, I might feel like a regular human? I don't know if that will happen. I think for now at least, I know what to aim for, and I'm not sure it will get me there this Summer.

I have heard that there are 80 year olds that can swim maybe 30 laps a week? woo.

Anyway.

This weekend I'm headed to New York. There's an event that I wanted to go to, but I'm opting to sideline it, though I'll be around. Several things around town seem fun to do. I can't believe I'm traveling while sometimes dealing with chest pains... Told the doctors, they're like: "cool, have fun." lol.

It's not too bad actually, the chest pains haven't been around too much lately. Just... two weird things: occasional sharp pain in my right lung/rib has happened a few times this week since trying some under water swimming.. reminds me of a pain I had in my left lung/rib maybe within a year after the surgery.

And this one is really strange: I'm having a feeling where I think I'm supposed to be feeling pain when certain things happen, but if I look back at recent memory... it's as if.. the pain may or may not have been there, seems like it must have been, but I can't actually remember the pain, just, assume that it must have been there, but as best I can recall, it wasn't. There are instances where I talk to people, and maybe say something negative, and I assume that saying something negative is associated with pain. I have had this happen both ways. Sometimes, I say something negative, and I have a pain while I say it, and sometimes, I say something negative, and that pain is not there. And I think I can definitely feel pain if something negative is said to me, but I think it is similar, and also not every time.. I'm definitely not aiming for negative things to be said to me. And putting a positive spin on things would be great, but if you follow along, then you could probably see that there's reason why that's not easy...

I have posted before, and I will post it again now... the internet has at least one or two search engines that argue that people who have had heart surgery tend to have issues about having a positive outlook. I'm grateful that the internet is providing information that can help people understand what's going on. It would be awesome not have that issue. I used to have things going a lot better for me in general society.. and at that time, I was able to control enough to output positive information better than I can or choose to these days. But even with things going better, I was still struggling.. I just don't think it's possible to have an easy time after HS.

All this usual talk, and I'm just trying to be excited about the upcoming weekend lol.

I'm going to New York!!

Yeah, I still travel a little. With any luck, a great trip.

皆さん、元気でね！