FOMO retrospect

[sennashi_dorei]

I wonder if you miss your high school days. I still studied when I was school age at least a bit, but I often look back, and just think that I haven't done enough, or I'm just not where I should be.

I've been listening to math videos while folding origami, all morning. Ah well.

Everything feels so futile but also great at the same time. I'm enjoying working on my project, but it'll be done in no time, and then what will I work on next? I have no idea, just random new stuff every here and there.

I just literally exactly feel like I own myself sort of for now, but always temporarily, and humans do nothing but manipulate eachother to do something, and the cheaper it can be done, the better, there is no care, and there is no value.

Just: "Please work, that's the only thing that matters. Work needs to get done, and you forever have debts to pay."

I'm just tired of how meaningless everything is and continues to be. You would have to explain why the horrible things that have happened to me, actually did, and you will never be able to. There is zero reason to put a heart surgery recipient in a jail cell. I want to argue there is zero reason to put anyone in a jail cell.

I am just tired. Nothing is ever going to turn out good.

Comments

[sennashi_dorei]

And yet crimes have been committed against me. Some of the crimes, I look at and say, that doesn't need to be jailed, and some of them, yes, those people probably should get locked up. It's just that I want justice to work for ME, but isn't it supposed to work for everyone? There is no way for life to be good. This species is horrible.