Sep. 17th, 2024

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I woke up today, and as if to completely contradict what I wrote yesterday, I actually felt mostly fine waking up today. It must happen sometimes, maybe even more often than I think, but yesterday when I was waking up, I could only feel like that was the common thing to happen.

There are a few things that I have to look forward to, not everything is completely horrible.
sennashi_dorei: (Default)
It's been a super awesome day. My pain levels have been near zero for something like almost 4 days now. Today I woke up feeling good to begin with, and the day continued to feel great. The other day I complained about nothing exciting going on, and today it just fixed itself for me as does sometimes happen. Went to check out a small old airplane that is currently under repair! I love little adventures like this. I'm not sure what to do about the pictures: because I took some, and I keep wondering if I should go back to uploading images.. I actually usually use insta for that recently, so again, maybe I wasn't completely truthful about not uploading images.. but I used to upload to my major social media, and now I use sub channels.

Something weird about the pain because I think it's good that you might know:

I feel euphoric without pain. Even if I have monetary complaints about society etc, with the pain gone, I am just happy not to be dealing with that. And societal exclusion is still strong but less so than it was? This whole game of life is just so random, it seems like nothing is filled with purpose. I actually studied Japanese for a sense of purpose, I don't think that will sound odd at all, I can imagine that many people that become multi-lingual might have that going on.

Highlights of the day:Hanging out with my friend and seeing an airplane. A fun trip to get out there. Still getting some geometry studies done, plus exercise. Other stuff happened too, but hey, I like highlights.
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This is unfortunately one of my favourite topics? Today was such a good health day, I was completely able to forget about pain at all, for much of the day. I didn't think about heart surgery, or bad things, nice day.

I was flipping through some old photos, and I have a hobby of taking selfies.. this includes when I'm in pain. Sometimes I take pictures when I'm in pain, and do my best to hide it, and see what happens. It's a funny experiment.. but as I said, there were two atrocious days last week, and I took at least one picture.. as soon as I came up to that picture, I remembered instantaneously about the pain that I was in when it was taken. Oh it was horrible, but if I look back now, I just think "how sad." Well, another funny thing is, sometimes I take pictures where I'm feeling well, and if you saw the picture, I bet you'd think I wasn't feeling well! I guess you'd just call that a bad picture? Sometimes it matches, and sometimes it doesn't. There's just a few photos in particular where as soon as I see it, I know what was happening, and why I took that picture. There was one that I took after leaving an emergency room from a very seriously bad day.. I could actually see some version of shock on my face. Ah, trying to forget pain and move on. What a great day.

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