A really great day so far.
Oct. 2nd, 2024 09:37 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sennashi_doreiNot even 10 in the morning... ah, last night, I actually got enough sleep, and by enough, I mean finally a lot again. Insomnia has not been too horrible lately, this past Spring was the worst it's ever been.
I woke up very early this morning, and I didn't feel bad at all, but I didn't exactly want to get up, either.
The sirens are still driving me mad. I understand Van Gogh so well these days, this just is not right.
Made several plans, and told myself: if I get these few things done today, I will feel accomplished. I guess I set the bar low, because they're all already roughly done!
Morning thought:
I took a break from exercising yesterday, and there are parts of me that want to take 2 days off in a row... I'm currently debating about it, but I think I'm going to go for a walk soon. I regularly feel very scared of overdoing it.
What happened:
I went for my walk! I had a great time. It was explorative, walked along streets never taken before, and did slightly more cardio without extreme exercise than usual.
How I felt in the morning before walk:
I don't really want to go for a walk today. I don't feel like it would improve the quality of my day so much as feel like an obligation point that I'm ticking off, wondering if is actually causing detriment instead of help.
How I felt after my morning walk, 8000 steps:
I feel amazing, accomplished, in good health. It was a slightly rainy day, so when I go for a walk on a day like this, I feel like a stupid person that might catch pneumonia. But my health felt good.. sometimes on my good health days, I opt not to exercise so that I can enjoy rest, and because I'm afraid that if I do something, it will ruin how great I'm feeling. So I tested it today, and I feel beyond great and glad I went for a walk. Hopefully I don't catch pneumonia lol.
Morning thoughts:
Maybe I will feel more up for it in the afternoon.. "If you don't want to do something, then don't." This is the issue with jobs these days. Ask me if I want to be sitting in a medical office, helping people receive medical care while accruing an income right now, and the answer is exactly yes. But I'm not wasting endless time on applications that are constantly being ignored. I set a limit on how much free time I give away, even though it's currently all being told to me is free, which basically is just a continued statement of how worthless I am. I hate what my life is being treated as.
After my walk:
The afternoon is just beginning soon, and I'm excited to have just a few things that feel worth doing, but also be able to sort of take it easy. I often feel like I'm being forced to take it too easy. I really wish I had a job.
I woke up very early this morning, and I didn't feel bad at all, but I didn't exactly want to get up, either.
The sirens are still driving me mad. I understand Van Gogh so well these days, this just is not right.
Made several plans, and told myself: if I get these few things done today, I will feel accomplished. I guess I set the bar low, because they're all already roughly done!
Morning thought:
I took a break from exercising yesterday, and there are parts of me that want to take 2 days off in a row... I'm currently debating about it, but I think I'm going to go for a walk soon. I regularly feel very scared of overdoing it.
What happened:
I went for my walk! I had a great time. It was explorative, walked along streets never taken before, and did slightly more cardio without extreme exercise than usual.
How I felt in the morning before walk:
I don't really want to go for a walk today. I don't feel like it would improve the quality of my day so much as feel like an obligation point that I'm ticking off, wondering if is actually causing detriment instead of help.
How I felt after my morning walk, 8000 steps:
I feel amazing, accomplished, in good health. It was a slightly rainy day, so when I go for a walk on a day like this, I feel like a stupid person that might catch pneumonia. But my health felt good.. sometimes on my good health days, I opt not to exercise so that I can enjoy rest, and because I'm afraid that if I do something, it will ruin how great I'm feeling. So I tested it today, and I feel beyond great and glad I went for a walk. Hopefully I don't catch pneumonia lol.
Morning thoughts:
Maybe I will feel more up for it in the afternoon.. "If you don't want to do something, then don't." This is the issue with jobs these days. Ask me if I want to be sitting in a medical office, helping people receive medical care while accruing an income right now, and the answer is exactly yes. But I'm not wasting endless time on applications that are constantly being ignored. I set a limit on how much free time I give away, even though it's currently all being told to me is free, which basically is just a continued statement of how worthless I am. I hate what my life is being treated as.
After my walk:
The afternoon is just beginning soon, and I'm excited to have just a few things that feel worth doing, but also be able to sort of take it easy. I often feel like I'm being forced to take it too easy. I really wish I had a job.
